Watford’s a shit hole, I wanna go home

Cq376bBWEAAXpZCThere are many challengers. Hull, Burnley, Everton, QPR, for the worst away day in the Premier League but after this weekends game, we have a clear winner. Watford Away. Vicarage Road.

Lets set the scene.

Just a 20 minute train journey from Euston. It is like an away day, but not really an away day.

The stadium is a long old walk from the station, with a half way stop at the Moon Under Water. A pub that moonlights as a sauna. Usually a Weatherspoon’s has beer stained carpets. The Moon Under Water has sweat stained.

You then get to the stadium, and what they have done after recent refurbishment is shocking.

For away fans, there is ONE entrance. Un. Uno. Um. Eins. Unus. Odin. Jeden. 1.

So you have a few thousand away fans trying to get through a single door. and that is what the entrance is. A single door like you are entering a shop. It is only when you go through the door you reach the turnstiles. Four of them.

Now what idiot designed this? Usually turnstiles are on the outside. Giving you 4 ways to get in. At Vicarage Road, we had to go through this sodding door, one by one, and then have the 4 turnstiles. It was pointless.

I have never queued to get in a game before. But a half hour queue to get into Watford meant I missed the first 10 minutes. Despite getting to the stadium at 14:40. Disgraceful organisation.

Then you have the Watford fans. They think they are Borussia Dortmund. But they are not, they are not even Crystal Palace.

Sat silently throughout the 1st half. Plenty of empty seats despite the stadium being tiny. Zero atmosphere. Except for a bumble bee hitting a drum.

What crap club hires a bumble bee to his a drum for 90 minutes? Modern football at its finest.

Keep an eye on the bumble bee though. He is an embarrassment. Diving to the ground feigning injury whenever a player is down injured. Mocking players like Nacho Monreal who were actually injured. The bumble bee probably thinks its banter. Thinks it is hilarious. But he isn’s. He is just a sad man (or woman) in a bumble bee outfit hitting a drum.

At half time, there was no beer. This does my head in and is coming to more and more grounds. No beer. Thanks guys.

Some point in the second half the Watford fans woke up. For all of 20 seconds. We have all seen the cringey Crystal Palace Ultras. Watford have tried to mimic this. But it is even worse. About 30 blocks in a single block with flags who made noise for 20 seconds lead by their bumble bee hero.

An odd bunch of fans who cheered and mocked when Jack Wilshere was rightly booked. But threw their toys out of the pram whenever a decision went against them, decisions which the referee got completely right.

Watching their fans running along the side lines to have a go at the linesman was hilarious. Especially the fat bird in a Watford shirt 2 sizes too small with her arm in a sling.

I had to laugh when she stuck 2 fingers up at The Arsenal fans when Watford got 1 back. It was 3-1. Well done love.

Then is comes to the final whistle. 6 exits. So we have 6 exits and one entrance. Kind of highlights that Vicarage Road is a place built to leave, not to enter. Then we have the half hour walk home. Via the sweaty Weatherspoon’s.

The away day only saved by The Flag near Watford Junction Station.

I would not be too upset when Watford go down this season.


18 thoughts on “Watford’s a shit hole, I wanna go home

  1. Stephen

    Arsenal fans were by far the quietest we’ve seen at vicarage road shocking support, completely stupid article, ref was awful, another plastic Arsenal fan 😂

  2. Ian

    Might help if you could spell! maybe take it in when term time starts again and show teacher, some phonics homework should help!

  3. Foxy

    The Vic is a PROPER ground with REAL fans who’ve seen the highs and lows of the English football league. And yes, arsenal plastics the quietist we’ve had at the Vic for a LONG time.
    I know where I’d rather go week in, week out…following our Watford with our loyal fan base, out-singing virtually every group of fans wherever we go. COYH!

  4. Barnesy

    Not a Watford fan but worst away day in the Premier League? You’ve got to be having, to use cockney vernacular, a giraffe. You even mention the cesspit at the start of your ‘article’, Turd Moor of course, a real shit hole. Arsenal, Man U, Liverpool, you all think you’re football royalty. Well you’re not.

  5. Harry

    I’d take Vicarage Road over the corporate, soulless Emirates any day. And it’s a hornet not a bee you illiterate. WTF is Gunnersaurus then?

  6. Lee cook

    You absolute mong the turnstiles for away fans is temp as the building work is still ongoing you absolute tool. And if you choose to go to a shithole pub like the moons which people like us that live in Watford don’t go to that’s your own fault mate. Half of your fans are from Watford anyway bar a few so I would put money on them knowing the right boozers to go to. Arsenal fans are all the same full of shit and love to settle for 4th (which I doubt you’ll even get this year). And maybe the bird in the sling looked like a dick but… Have you seen Al woods video’s, heavy D or arsenal tv??? People in glass houses… 😂😂😂

  7. Al

    Arsenal fans are the quietest we’ve ever had at the Vic. Clubs with 500 have made more noise!!! They win, but most of their fans have left by the 80th minute!!!! Great support

  8. Karl Wiggins

    Mate, your comparison of Watford town centre is, I assume, based on the pleasant and palatial areas around Arsenal and Finsbury Park.

    We expected you to bring some good support on Saturday, but nothing. Arsenal fans are without a doubt the dullest supporters to have visited the Vic for a long time.

    You’ve only got one chant, “Ars-suh-nul! Ars-suh-nul! Ars-suh-nul” and that was it. But for most of the game you were incapable of even managing that. Even Watford chants of, “Shall we sing a song for you?” failed to wake you up.

    The 3-1 score was only to be expected from a team who values just about every single player as more than the whole Watford squad, but in all honesty it flatters you. For the whole of the second half we growled at you, out-muscled you, beat you to the ball, made a nuisance of ourselves, and it has to be said out-manoeuvred you. In fact, if it wasn’t for Petr Čech the score line could have been very different. He was your saving grace.

    Arsenal play pretty-boy football. Good to watch on the telly, but there’s no real grit in your play. I did notice your support surprise us by adding another chant to your repertoire – making a total of two chants if my mathematics serves me correctly. “You might as well go home.” What you don’t realise, of course, is that we are home. Watford’s not a pretty place, but its home. I live a half-hour walk from Vicarage Road, and my son was born within spitting distance of the ground in Watford General next door. We are home, mate.

    Where’s your home? Borehamwood? Radlett? Or Surrey perhaps?

  9. StevenG

    If you think our ground is a shit hole, you haven’t been to many!
    There are plenty of places to drink before Vicarage Road, plus you even have your own pub ‘The Oddfellows’. Did you miss it on the way?
    Granted the entrance isn’t ideal, but the club is still building in that area.
    As for the atmosphere, it is all down to acoustics. There is plenty of noise coming from the Rookery, but for some reason it doesn’t travel too well. Ask any Watford fan who sat in there for your game and he/she will say that they hardly heard a peep from you lot.
    Try listening to your own fans at the Emirates – yes, hardly a sound!
    Think yourself lucky you have a newish stadium, but remember – it is not a true football stadium and a majority of your fans only follow you because of the ‘BIG Club’ status.

  10. Andrew Ash

    Zero Atmosphere!!!! What game where you watching?? Just because we have a 21000 capacity stadium it’s a shithole. I apologise to ALL arsenal fans because our stadium is too small. Also, you must be deaf, because the was a great atmosphere from the Watford fans. Of course, you would say otherwise because your an Arsenal dumbass who only supports the club because they are in the top 5. It’s a hornet not a bee you twat. Arsenal fans don’t know what atmosphere is, because they only have one chant, home and away. I bet you live really far away, like in Scotland, but instead of being a lad and supporting your local team, which Watford fans do, you support the big boys. You really are just a twat


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